Spring Fever?

I know I should be excited the days are getting longer, the temperatures are getting warmer, and there's a hint of summer just around the corner. The truth is, there's something about the onset of Spring that makes me very sad. Or maybe it makes me have SAD, just in a different month than everyone else. I get super tired all the time and I just don't want to really do anything. I start thinking I have chronic fatigue, or some other deadly affliction, and then I remember that I get extra tired every year at this time.

I think the possibility of being able to do things outside reminds me of all the inside projects I never got around to doing over the winter. And then I start down this spiral thinking about everything in my life I didn't finish, or didn't finish well, and then I start thinking that I'm never going to be successful, and everyone hates me and I'm going to end up homeless and alone.

I know it's not rational, but sometimes I'm not rational. Instead, I lay in bed a little longer, I wear my sweatpants a little more often, and I drink a little more coffee. This year I'm trying to be somewhat proactive. I'm working on projects more often, I'm cleaning and getting rid of a LOT of things. I'm making the area around me a little happier in hopes that it will be a reflection of myself. And you know what? I think it's working.

For starters, I'm watching less TV. It is so easy for me to get sucked into sitting on the couch all day, and then the laundry doesn't get folded, the dishes don't get washed, and nothing gets finished. By limiting my TV time, I am able to get a lot more accomplished, and I start feeling like there are more hours in a day, and maybe I'm not quite the failure I thought I was.

I will keep you guys updated, but this is shaping up to be the best Spring ever! Or, at least I'm trying to make it the best Spring ever.

Happy Birthday Daddio!

Last Monday was my dad's birthday. My dad LOVED his birthday. His excitement every year rivaled that of a ten year old, and while at times it was annoying, it was also wonderful and contagious. We celebrate every birthday in our family with the same exuberance, getting the whole fam together for dinner and cake, and a few presents. Having his birthday in January was an added bonus because, frankly, January sucks. It's cold, we're usually low on money, and it's easy to get depressed. But his birthday was a chance to celebrate, laugh, and forget about the middle of winter for a little bit.

We still all got together and had a great meal and a great time, but it just wasn't the same. I knew all the firsts without him were going to be hard. We made it through a lot of other birthdays, Thanksgiving, Christmas, but his birthday was just impossible for me. It caught me by surprise. Sometimes it's good to be caught by surprise, let out a few tears, and get it all out there.

In the last few years our family has grown, and winter isn't as bleak as it used to be. We now have another birthday in January, one in February, and then things warm up a little in March. There are many causes for celebration, and my dad loved every second of it. I'm so happy that I live in close proximity with the majority of my family, that we're able to get together on all these occasions, and sometimes just because it's Tuesday.

Happy Thanksgiving!!

Though really I suppose it's Happy Black Friday! I work in retail, so for me it's not all that happy. And I work for a store that got to be open on Thanksgiving, so super fun time there. While it was definitely not the best Thanksgiving I've ever had, I still have much to be thankful for.

Our three dogs drive me crazy at times, but our house would be empty without them. I have a lot of laundry to do, but it's wonderful we are able to afford clothes for ourselves, a washing machine and dryer to clean them, and this house to keep us warm. I'm grateful I have a dependable vehicle that gets me safely to and from my job, that will hopefully last for years to come.

I got to spend time with my mom and my "other" mom (my best friend's parents invited us over), and while I did not see my husband as much as I would have liked, I'm very thankful that we were able to get married while my dad was still alive and able to enjoy himself. It's been a rough year, and I'm so very grateful my husband has been so supportive through all of this.

And now it's on to Christmas! I did not venture out for any Black Friday deals this year, but I've decided Cyber Monday really appeals to me much, much more. Picking something out while in my pj's and having it shipped to my door is definitely the way to go. Although, I hope the hubs isn't home when it gets delivered!

Our First Anniversary

Hard to believe a year has gone by since our wedding!! Then again, so much has happened in the past year that it feels like forever ago. Our anniversary was yesterday, Mr. Fabulous had to work and I stayed home and looked through all of our pictures and listened to music as I made an effort to clean the house. That effort mostly failed as I spent a long time putting together his paper gift.

We attempted to go out to dinner at the restaurant where we had our first date (they also catered our rehearsal dinner), but we forgot that since it was Sunday, they were closed. Instead of going to a different restaurant, we decided to get some chicken wings at the grocery store and go home and eat them in our pj's. My mom made us a replica of our cake top, and we ate that with some champagne. All in all, it was a pretty good night!

This is us at the grocery store. He's looking at me because he thinks I'm crazy for taking our picture, yet he's the one who ends up looking crazy ;) 

Our cake! And champagne! My mom did a great job recreating her masterpiece from last year.

And finally, his gift. 52 pieces of paper with ideas for us to do in the coming year until our next anniversary! I had originally seen a similar idea as a wedding gift suggestion, and then I searched the internet for 52 date ideas and saw that some other wives had done this (or something similar) for their first anniversary. Let me tell you, 52 things is harder than it sounds. I ran out of ideas after 12, which is why I was eagerly searching the internet for 40 more. I had them all written down, but when I copied them onto the colorful paper for the jar, I threw the list away. Oops! But I'll let you know each week what he chooses! 

Of course when John opened it, he had to take a few out and see what was in there, but I wouldn't let him read all of them. I tried to keep it to things that cost little or no money, a lot of them are things we always say we're going to do, and then never do them. A few are season specific, so I hope we choose them in the right season! It's hard to built a snowman or go ice skating in the summer, but I guess part of the challenge will be making it happen no matter what. And the general idea is to get us out of our habit of having dinner and watching tv each evening. 

Here's to a year of fun and adventure! 

I've been avoiding posting for a few weeks because, well, my dad died. And I thought I had to write something profound and heartfelt to show how wonderful he was and how much I loved him. But I was heartbroken and couldn't find the words.

Then I had too many words. They all came jumbled inside, and I had to get all of them out, but it made no sense and because the world's longest run on sentence.

So here's what you need to know: I love my dad. Though he was sick for a long time, and I truly recognize that he's in a better place and not suffering anymore, I still wasn't ready to not have a dad anymore. Most days I get through the day just fine, and then it will hit me that he's not here anymore.

There doesn't have to be just one post about my dad, there can be many. I have thirty years of memories of him, I can't get them all out at once. I think that's how it should be. Someday, I will tell you all about his last days, because they were actually quite wonderful. Right now it's all a little raw, but now it's out there, and I can move on ever so slightly, a little bit at a time.